Scored by the finest Belgian chocolatiers

FIFA have this year introduced an award named after Ferenc Puskás (or, as they've renamed him, FIFA Puskás). It's a kind of global goal-of-the-year competition. Watching some of those YouTube videos crammed full of great goals can feel a bit like eating bad, cheap chocolate just because because you wanted to have some damn chocolate — any chocolate — and subsequently feeling ashamed at your hideous lapse in taste. To watch this compilation of the Puskás-shortlisted goals, though, is to indulge in something that has at least 80% metaphorical cocoa solids in it. Voici après le... uh ... jumpe.



(Video via Back Page Football.)

Nine beautiful goals, plus that Grafite one. Marvellous.

The winner was Cristiano Ronaldo, the confused pubescent girl vote always being strong in popular plebiscites not sensible enough to impose an age limit and a requirement to travel to a polling station. But seriously, folks, before I quite literally virtually crack myself up, some notes:

* For goals scored in the Champions League knockout stages, the Adebayor and Essien strikes have gone dreadfully underappreciated. Of course, Villarreal-Arsenal had a combined global TV audience of me and my dad, and Essien's was followed by some ... stuff. But still. You are silly sometimes, world.

* Speaking of which, put Grafite's goal next to Nilmar's and tell me you still feel the same way you did about the former as you did when it happened.

* Not to be too drippy about it, but don't the Atar, Landín and Torres goals make your heart soar, to be reminded of the so-mad-it's-saner-than-sane improvisatory genius that really can elevate it above simply being twenty-two men kicking a bag of blah blah blah, the strikes right to the heart of what keeps bringing us back to this maddening pursuit? *sigh*

My major problem with the Puskás Award, scrumptious waste of time though it may be, is that it wasn't judged by me. I have therefore instituted the Fredorraci Prize to satisfy my Father Jack-like desire to have something to do with an "Award! Award!". The winner is not necessarily the best goal I saw all year, but it's the most beautiful — so beautiful that the photograph illustrates it better than the video ever could. You know the words, folks, sing along...