McCarthy: mack-ur-TEE
Quinn: Keane
Keogh: kyuck
Duffy: doo-FAY
McGeady: mack-a-DEE-dee
CiarĂ¡n: see-air-AAAAAAAAAAN
Coleman: first syllable is actually pronounced 'coal'
Randolph: was originally Ralph until he added a silent 'ndo' in honour of Cameroon's finest
Cyrus Christie: Chris Christ
Robbie Keane: BOB-let KANE
Long: lung (from the Irish Mac Long, son of Boatface)
Shay Given: oh fuck, Ralph's holding his hamstring
Jonathan: FRANK-and
Wes Hoolahan: Wes
Hendrick: Hendrix
Daryl Murphy: WUR-fee (the 'M' is an upside-down 'W' in Irish (except for exceptions)); 'Daryl' contains one-and-a-half syllables
Westwood: o-ho, Given's holding his hamstring
Glenn Whelan: Glenn "Leave 'Em Bealin'" Whelan
Robbie Brady: Dead-Ball Specialist OR Dead-Ball Specialist Me Arse
Stephen Ward: Stephenward (hence "the winger's headed Stephenwardward")
James McClean: on-a-YELL-oh
David Meyler: Ireland's Unlikely Hero
Martin O'Neill: Michael O'Neill, I mean Martin O'Neill
Roy Keane: Distraction?
Athenry: ath-HEN-ree, definitely ath-HEN-ree
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